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I hate when people ask what im doing tomorrow I dont even know what Im doing right now stop doing this to me

April 16th / 227,533 notes

  • police: OPEN THE DOOR NOW
  • me: um not if you keep yelling

April 16th / 101,150 notes


adult: “do u know what college you want to go to yet?”

me: [sweats nervously] MONSTERS UNIVERSITY

April 16th / 261,763 notes

this is so cute!!!


i am perfectly fine with having other people sit on my lap but i can’t sit on other people’s laps because i’m always paranoid that i’d crush them and they’d diE

April 16th / 653,199 notes


till deactivation do us part

April 16th / 36,984 notes



Honestly, this is better than a good morning text. It’s 4am and you’re thinking about me.

I’m never not reblogging this because this means so much more than any other post I’ve seen and ugh.

this is perfect



when u go out to eat with ur friends and have no money


April 16th / 18,213 notes

I take super hot showers because I like to practice burning in hell

April 16th / 312,732 notes


The human body has 7 trillion nerves and some people manage to get on every single fucking one of them

April 16th / 474,130 notes